Finch Bird

THIRTEEN, The Brown Thrasher, GeorgiaIs there a more boring state bird from the original thirteen colonies? Of course there isn’t. I’m a big fan of Georgia. From their peaches to their peaches (their women), there might not be a better state, but as far as state birds go, they’re down in the  basement.TWELVE, The American Robin, ConnecticutOkay, this one might be as bad as the brown thrasher. At least, the brown thrasher is a fairly rare bird (ugly but rare). The robin is as common on the eastern seaboard as common street trash. They might as well call the robin, Common Street Trash Bird. I have no time for robins, Connecticut women or the WNBA. And I’ve been saying this for years.ELEVEN, The Blue Hen Chicken, DelawareThe first of two chicken state birds from our two smallest states, fitting or fittingly stupid enough to make me sick? I don’t know who’s to blame for giving these two great, but small, states such weak state birds, but I’d like to take him out and back and show them how we used to do it in the old country.TEN, The Rhode Island Red Chicken, Rhode IslandSee Delaware.NINE, The Carolina Wren, South CarolinaLeave it to the people of one of the country’s stupidest states to come up with one of the dumbest state birds. It’s no wonder they call this little birdie the crustacean of the air. It’s so tiny and stupid, I bet the Carolina Wren only has a thimble-sized brain. EIGHT, The Northern Cardinal, North CarolinaAnd who could forget the Carolina’s better half and their ridiculous state bird, the northern cardinal. The northern cardinal? Excuse me, North Carolina is still in The South. So dumb. Plus, this little guy has got to be the most pathetic excuse for a cardinal I have ever seen.SEVEN, The Black-capped Chickadee, MassachusettsOh, am I supposed to be sacred of your state bird just because it’s name sounds like a famous bank robber’s moniker? I think not. Leave it to the people of Beantown to come up with such a ludicrous feathered friend.SIX, The Baltimore Oriole, Maryland